July 28, 2016

I see my death just about every day.  Usually it’s a car accident:  I easily envision the car driving towards me in the opposing lane swerving, hitting me, or a vehicle from nowhere suddenly T-boning the driver’s side of the car I’m driving.  My brain creates these accidents so quickly and easily –  I’m amazed with the complex descriptors (vivid colors, sounds, smells).  I hear metal crunch, glass shatter, smell the oil and rubber.  I feel my body being broken, too.  I can smell blood.  All of this in a few seconds.  Then the car passes and that death ends – until the next one.  This has been going on for years with me.  I have more “control” when I’m driving the vehicle, because I am such a hyper-vigilant driver, but I know the truth of how little control I actually have.  I am proud of how far I have come:  20 years ago I was terrified to drive; 15 years ago I had panic attacks while driving in L.A. traffic (do you know how slow L.A. traffic is??).  Now?  I can flip a u-turn in San Francisco and parallel park like a pro.

PhysiFullSizeRender(17)cal therapy this morning (where I met a feisty older woman from Transylvania) and within hours such pain in my back.

Work today became paradise when Carrie walked in and asked if I wanted nachos for lunch.  This occurred AT THE SAME MOMENT I was reading an email from Melissa in Santa Cruz about Conrad’s nachos – this being their official Nacho Day.  Talk about coincidence.  Wait a minute – there is no coincidence – that is God and God loves nachos.

I am quickly realizing my chances of meeting someone I am attracted to on Match is slim to none.  I’M STILL GOING TO DO IT!  I WILL STILL MEET MEN, but sweet GOD change up your profiles a little bit.

It began when I saw Ang and Kelley writing about Shakedown Street – <interest peaked>, but my back was raging.  This can’t be another Furthur experience where the band stops touring/playing, right? I’ll go another time.  HOWEVER! My Hipnic husband later mentioned the plan: tacos, pre-party and then pit tickets for Dead & Co.  Yes, temps will be in the hundreds (hence my dream of living closer to the Bay Area) but I’ll be with MY PEOPLE!!  <happy dance to Shakedown Street>

Picture: Pit tickets with my people. ❤

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