Fests are a little different, ok, a lot different for me now. Previously, as soon as I’d wake up, the timeline focus was on getting to the location as quickly as possible for fomo (fear of missing out). Yesterday morning was quite different and I didn’t leave home til 1:15, despite waking before 8. 
One part of my morning was a dizziness which is semi-uncommon. “Am I hung over?” I asked Ethan, who grinned. But of course, it wasn’t that. It was something which often happens with me in that I forget to pick up my Celexa, the latest anti-depressant I’ve been on for over a decade. After my head injury, I’ve take some sort of SSRI, though the strength and dosage of medication has been severely decreased. I tend to minimize it, however, and often neglect taking it daily and picking up refills on time. Picked up my meds and off to Hangtown Halloween Music Fest…
…Where I met Rickey, who was late for his shift for beer crew. I walked around the fest for a good 4 hours, listening to music, bumping into friends who are all in my music circle
of friends, meeting faces I’ve seen at other fests, but are so familiar to me. Music truly does bring people together. I saw a teenager listening to Ideateam, a Sacramento funk band, and he was wearing a Megadeath concert tshirt. Hell, yes!!
As sat on the hillside, listening to Turquaz, I watched a video sent to me by a friend. Amanda Palmer’s song “In My Mind” focuses on unrealistic expectations we place on ourselves, and coming to terms with the idealistic image of ourselves, which is in actuality not at all who we wish to be, once we are honest with ourselves:
“And it’s funny how I imagined
That I could be that person now
But that’s not what I want
But that’s what I wanted
And I’d be giving up somehow
How strange to see
That I don’t wanna be the person that I want to be.”
I love how my friends keep me in check.
Finally, finally, finally Rickey was off his shift. I think my time of being a solo everything-er is coming to an end. We grabbed some food and talked about relationships. This is the thing I love about Rickey as my fest-friend; we’ve developed this brother-sister support connection. We eventually moved our convo to the hillside for a period, but he had committed to a second shift to help out, so we soon parted ways and I headed to the car… until…a turntable set up by an RV was busting out some Dr. Dre and Snoop Dog, so I set down my poster and water and proceeded to Get Down with the other people getting down. Another aspect I love at these fests…always something going on. Eventually home with a sore back (damn disks), I proceeded to Face Time with Texas for 2.5 hours. Poor guy. Thank god for Sundays #amIright?
Pics ‘n vid: A favorite part of fests – the fabulous stilt-walkers (they were giants); Badassest dog at the fest; Yes, I am…. Amanda Palmer video. Thank you, Tatjana. ❤
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